Ask Dr. Mac » Miscellaneous

Resignation letter

Friday, January 16th, 2009

Dr. Mac,

I was desperately looking for a knowledgeable professional to proofread and help me out with a farewell (resignation) letter I would like to send by e-mail ASAP.

FYI, I am a college student and have been VOLUNTEERED every single week for more than a year as a research assistant in my college. Recently, time escapes me and unfortunately, I have decided to quit.

***********************************************************
Dear X and Y,

Sadly, today was my last day in the lab. It has been a pleasure working with you over the past year, and I really hope my efforts helped further the research.

X, I much appreciated working with you and learning from you. Many thanks for the guidance you provided me with and for always answering my questions.

Y, thank you first and foremost for giving me the opportunity to work in your lab. It has been a rewarding experience for me, and I have learned a lot that I might not have the chance to learn elsewhere.

Thanks again. I wish you well and I would always be glad to hear from you and possibly assist again you in the future.

-Kristy
***********************************************************

Hi Kristy.

A couple of thoughts:

First, was this strictly a volunteer position where you received no compensation whatsoever? I couldn’t tell from your comments.

The letter sounds fine. If you received pay, then you want to give a two-week notice in order to allow them the opportunity to find someone to replace you and to help with the transition of a new person coming in. Again, if this was strictly a voluntary position, then you are not obligated to do so, but it still would be the “nice” thing to do. Leaving someone in a bind is probably not the last impression that you want to leave behind, especially if you would like to use either of these two people as future references. Think about that.

I also would leave off the “possibly assist you again in the future” part since you are quitting. Why would they believe that?

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Student/teacher fling

Thursday, January 15th, 2009

Dr. Mac,

I’m a college sophomore. Ever since I started college, I have found myself to be physically and emotionally attracted to my advisor, who is not much older than I.

I don’t know what to do. At first I thought it was a silly crush…but now…

What would happen if it did? Is it illegal? Could he get fired and would I get suspended?

Now, I am almost positive he has absolutely no feelings for me, so I don’t know what I’m worried about…but…it just really occurred to me that I have an infatuation with him!! aaahhhh!!!

-Kay

Hi Kay.

You’re funny.

Is your advisor a grad student or residence hall advisor or simply a full-time academic advisor?

I ask because there would be more at stake for him if he’s full time, should you two ever date. I was a “grad student” with academic advising responsibilities when I was in school and dating an undergrad was not as big of a deal.

You may want to play it semi-safe by keeping any flirting to a low roar and see if he either responds, completely ignores it, or drops the name of his wife or girlfriend at some point. If he ignores the sexual chemistry that seems to be present, he’s probably very professional and doesn’t want to compromise his job by crossing that line. Should he flirt back, then maybe the chemistry is mutual. If that should happen, see what transpires. After all, he needs to be the one to find out if such behavior (i.e., dating a student who he advises) is frowned upon or not by the powers to be.

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Career troubles

Tuesday, January 13th, 2009

Dear Dr. Mac,

I recently graduated in a major I did not want. Why you ask? I bascially was shafted. I had good grades, good GPA, good attendance but I was denied entrance to 300 level edu class and to stay in my edu major during my jr/sr year. I could not switch to another school, by then other schools had started so ended up in an independant major. I asked why I would not be a teacher there and some baised to another school was verbally told to me. Also, they did not seem willing to accomandate me, even with my mild LD disability. I’m not completly sour. I took classses in the Human servie feild like signlangauge and a few early childhood classes. Howver, is there a way I can teach and/or assist teachers in the class. Heck, I’d love to tutor. I do have a job in daycare, but its very little teaching and more ‘babysitting.’ Is there any hope for me? Is it better to get a CDA or Early childhood certification througha school or training program. My goal is to teach some how, some way k-2 kids.
-H

Hi H. Thanks for your question.

Since the category that you posed your question to is “Dealing with Bosses and Coworkers,” you question is a little out of my expertise area and the realm of this category. With that said, I will throw out a few thoughts just the same.

First, your questions about teaching should really be directed at some of your education professors where you just graduated from. After all, they are familiar with you, the degree program, and they have all the contacts in the field. If you have not done this, don’t you think you should?

Second, you mentioned that you were denied entrance to 300-level classes. Why? There appears to be something that you failed to mention. Also, you imply that this was something “they” did to you. I’m curious, are you the victim in this case or could you have possibly contributed to the circumstance you ended up with?

Third, a teacher needs to be able to spell and grammatically write a sentence correctly. Re-read your paragraph above and see if you notice any errors. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t concerned about the misspellings and some grammatical errors that jumped out to me. H, you really need to keep working on this. Writing is critical if you ever want to be a teacher.

H, My suggestion at this point would be to get a career coach (just google “career coaches” on the web and find someone that has some experience in the education/teaching field). This way you can explore options, seek out additional guidance, and begin taking steps towards teaching or tutoring.

Best of luck. -Dr. Mac

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Family Business Issue

Saturday, January 10th, 2009

Doc,

I work at a family owned business with my parents. My father started the company about eight years ago and I came on board seven years ago. It was a small operation but we were able to get it off the ground. I feel like I was the main contributor to getting the company rolling since I developed the software program that allowed the business to run efficiently and grow as new sales came in.

Approximately three years into it, my father brings my mother into the company so she could move away from her previous job and gave her something to do. Her duties are limited but since she likes to be in control she puts her influence in every employee’s job and all daily activities. She has become the boss of the company by simply always having the final say.

My biggest issue is that she has a terrible addiction to shopping and thus requires a hefty payroll to support her habit. Although I run all day-to-day operations and generate all sales income for the company, she earns more than twice as much as I do. Most days I feel like my job is to have the company earn enough money so she can get paid her unjustified high salary. It’s not that I have an issue with her earning a significant income; it’s the disparity between her income and all other employees in the company.

My question to you is what is the best way to approach this issue? My father is often caught in the middle of knowing what is right and trying not to have to deal with her wrath on a personal level. After all, he has to live with her after hours. One of my dilemmas of approaching my father is that I really appreciate everything that I have been given – from this job to my salary to any benefits that I receive. But I don’t like the growing resentment that I have towards my mother as I watch her pillage this companies resources and puts it in great financial stress.
-Jonathan

Hi Jonathan.

You make the statement that your mom’s addiction to shopping is why she is getting a hefty payroll. I’m not sure you want to go there. The two may not be related and I’d suggest you release that assumption. I’m guessing that she liked shopping before and that this is not anything new.

Is your mother spending company money on shopping? If so, is she purchasing things the company needs? I ask because if this is true, then it is a separate issue from what she is getting paid. If it is true, then you have a legitimate gripe to bring to your father. If she is not spending company money when she shops, then once again, let it go. Why waste energy on something so insignificant.

The issues as I see them are:

1. The salary your mother is making.

2. The role that your mother is now playing in the company.

3. Your frustration with your father who clearly is playing right into this dynamic.

4. You feel a little under-appreciated, given how you’ve helped the company more than your mother has.

Am I close?

Certainly talking with your father is the best option. I’m talking about a heart-to-heart conversation here where you diplomatically lay your frustrations out on the table as discussion items, as opposed to complaints. Be prepared to have some solutions however.

Another option is to get your father to buy in to the idea of bring a consultant in to assess the company on multiple levels, from efficiency to management practices to salary distribution. There are consultants who specialize in family business issues. This approach lets an objective outsider make recommendations that might be better received than if your brought them up. All you have to do is sell your father and mother on the idea of bringing in someone. It is no different than going to the doctor for a physical or bringing your car in for a check-up. Just a good practice to do periodically.

Lastly, there seems to some issues for you with your mother. You may want to see a counselor for a bit in order to separate out the business aspect of your relationship with your personal side. It is not unusual in family businesses to mix these two together. Not good.

-Dr. Mac
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A bad reference

Wednesday, November 26th, 2008

Hi, I’m Andrew and I’m not sure if this is your area of expertise but I’d be intrested to see what you think.

I recently was offerd a job with a company. I said yes and they said they would check my refrences. I gave them two and today human resorces phoned and asked for another refrence. This has got me worried that my old company has said something bad about me. The employer I had listed was from a company I left about two years ago and my manager had changed since then so im not sure weather its because no one remmembers me or if I got a bad reference. I didnt do anything wrong at the job. I am now starting to think maybe i shouldn’t take this job as I feel bad things may have been said and that they might think I’m no good. Do you think I should turn this down? I didnt ask them why they wanted another refrence. If I did ask, would they have told me? Many thanks Andrew

Hi Andrew.

Few employers will risk providing a negative reference for you no matter what your reason for leaving the company. Rather, they will either give you a stock “name, rank, and serial number” recommendation or, however reluctantly, a positive reference. However, often times you can tell as much by what a former employer isn’t saying. For example, if a former employer didn’t have a lot of positive things to say about you, that alone could make a company want to check additional references.

My guess is they have requested an additional reference because your former supervisor no longer works at your previous company and they wanted to talk with someone who could speak to your work ethic and ability to work well with others. Hopefully you were able to provide them with another reference.

Andrew, I wouldn’t put a whole lot of effort into worrying about why you were asked for a third reference, assuming you have nothing to hide. You don’t, do you? What I would do in the future is make sure your references are not only reachable but give them a heads-up as well that they might be called. That way they are not put on the spot and unprepared.

-Dr. Mac

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Researching companies

Tuesday, November 4th, 2008

Is there any way a person can research a company and the higher ups when you get offered a job or even before you’re offered the job? So, the above situations don’t happen.

-Kelley

Hi Kelley. You can tell something about a company from an outsider perspective by googling the company name and following any press releases that the links take you to. You can also get the names of the company officers from both the company website and through the googling effort I already mentioned. Then google the individual names of the officers to see what kind of information comes up and follow that information (by looking at any links associated with a particular name). And lastly, you might be able to locate the company’s annual shareholder report (if it is a public company) on the company website or by googling the company. All of these efforts should give you a “feel” for the company to assess if it has been successful and managed well. The other perspective that reveals a lot about a company is from the employees that currently work there. You can get that oftentimes by asking particular questions in an interview (should you get one) or if you happen to know someone who works there. I believe both perspectives are important. I took a job once with a very reputable company and failed to talk with any of the employees. The job ended up being a disaster. I learned my lesson to say the least.

-Dr. Mac

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