Thanks for writing.

Using second-hand information to confront an employee is not the best way to address such an issue. Did the employee who reported the other employee to you first attempt to confront the employee him/herself before coming to you? If not, why not? Would that same employee be willing to bring the issue up to the other employee with you present in the room? And were either of these options discussed with the complaining employee who brought the issue to you? I mention both of these points because you want to make sure that you don’t create a “parent-child” dynamic with your staff where employees readily complain about each other to you instead of to each other.

Another point: The problem with using information that you’ve “heard” around the office is that you begin to create an environment of distrust between your own employees. Most employees being confronted with such information would likely want to know who was the one who passed that information on to you. My guess is that they would have their own version of the story that they’d want to tell you. They would also become more suspicious of their fellow employees knowing that someone had gone to you. Is that the kind of work environment that you want? I’m guess not. Hence, you are better off sharing your own personal apprehensions about their ability to know the fine line around guest fraternization and ask that they pay particular attention to maintaining a professional distance when it comes to guests. Make sure you both have the same understanding of the policy and the consequences. Explain again why that is so important to you and to the company. If you are still suspicious of this person after a few weeks, then do your own checking into the situation. Since you’ve already had the one-on-one about this issue, you now can gather information from multiple sources and use that information to build your case for whatever actions you might take.

Cheryl, I hope you can see the potential problem with using second-hand information with the initial confrontation with this employee. As you can see, there is a difference between an employee complaining to you about another employee and you seeking out information from multiple souces in order to address an issue that you have already discussed with a particular employee. I hope I’ve given you some things to think about. I’d be happy to hear more from you on this situation.